But I can! Mostly, per the header, it's about Dan Patrick. But, there's a bit about fracking, too.
First, Danny Boy.
Of course, Danny Boy doesn't admit to being a nutbar, but, he is.
Mother Jones is our first stop on the nutbar as dog's messenger tour.
Here's a few samples, starting here.:
On his first book, actually titled The Second Most Important Book You Will Ever Read: "As the author, I am obviously biased," Patrick wrote in an Amazon review of his own book. But "since God inspired me to write this book," he added, "He automatically gets 5 stars and the CREDIT!'"
On Duck Dynasty: Patrick tried to raise money off of Duck Dynasty patriarch Phil Robertson's comments about homosexuality in GQ, boasting that the bearded reality star was channeling another bearded visionary. "This is an exciting time for Christians," he wrote on Facebook. "God is speaking to us from the most unlikely voice, Phil Robertson, about God's Word. God is using pop culture and a highly successful cable TV show to remind us about His teaching."
On his inspiration for this painting of Christ's face on the Statue of Liberty:In teaching myself how to watercolor I was trying different styles. After a beach scene, I decided to try a Peter Max type of painting of the Statue of Liberty. I could not get the fact right and used water to remove the paint on her face. When it dried and I tried to clean it up suddently [sic] the face of Jesus appeared so clearly. It struck me that Jesus face on the Statue of Liberty sends an incredible message that the real light that our country has sent in the past, and needs to send once again today, is we are a nation that stands on His Word This was only my 4th try at a painting I had no idea of how to paint the face of Jesus, nor was I trying to do so.
On the separation of church and state: "There is no such thing as separation of church and state."
Well, wrong. Unfortunately, barring the secular equivalent of a miracle, there's no separation of Dan Patrick's ideas about church and the statehouse's Lite Guv position.