Elmo's Tex-ass cluelessness in "helping" Kenny Boy Paxton

If you, like me, live in Tex-ass (yes, that’s how I pronounce it, and no, I didn’t get here as soon as I can, but, for better and for worse, one brother was born here and both paternal great-grandfathers lived various portions of life here) …

You’ve been seeing plenty of shit like this:

In your mailbox.

And, yes, it’s Elmo’s — America PAC from the South African native.

You’ve probably also gotten a shit-ton of phone texts. Mine have been mainly about Kenny Boy, though one or two have been about Strangeabbott and one or two about Dannie Goeb.

Strangeabbott? Think 1964, and I was WAYYY ahead of Jasmine Crockett’s semi-lame “Gov. Hot Wheels.” Per my Blogger tag, the first post was 2014, when he was still just Gov-elect.

For my second post using that tag, I Photoshopped this:

I had additional fund with his Jesuitical lawyerly word-parsing during COVID:

In hindsight, he looks like he’s holding a handful of big-boobed bras, which would of course be a good summary of today’s Texas Rethuglican Party.

Anyway, back to Kenny Boy, whom I call that over the late, great Kenny Boy Ken Lay of Enron.

Seriously?

(I forgot to scan another flyer that, as I said in a note a week or so ago, implies that Commies are about to overrun rural Texas, or rurales Tejas, led by Uncle Karl Marx himself, whose face was on the flyer.)

Seriously?

Yeah, I guess Elmo is appealing to the MAGAts base to do an Angela Paxton and “stand by their man” while holding their nose and voting. This stuff surely doesn’t appeal to independent centrists.

Plus, it makes no sense? “Back to the dugout”? Is this playing on baseball’s postseason, even as Baseball is Dying™, especially in Tex-ass?

I mean, “Bench Talarico” makes more sense. I’d say “Turn out the lights for Talarico, his party is over, Friday night and every night,” riffing on both football and Willie Nelson, but Willie would be MASSIVELY pissed about stealing his copyright, and fake Texan Elmo wouldn’t get either that or the football riff anyway. (That said, why isn’t Talafreako asking Willie if it’s OK for HIM to do that?)

Meanwhile, on those texts? Even though I am not a Democrap, I do an anti-Republican spin on the name of the candidate for whom the PAC is texting, then block after replying. (For instance, one text for Dan Patrick, I mentioned Dannie Goeb’s vasectomy and since it referred to sex and gender issues, asked if they wanted my help going beyond a vasectomy for him.)

Seriously, part 2? This is yet another reason Merikkka is a failing state. Not only do we have plutocratic billionaires putting their thumb on political races without limitation, due to the Supreme Court castrated McCain-Feingold, we have so much of their money sloshing around that it goes into the stupidest of flyers and texts that appeal only to baseline (or brain-flatline) MAGAts.

Seriously, part 3? Where are the Democraps, speaking of?

Talarico the Talafreako, at least recently, had more money than Kenny Boy. His campaign knows direct mail exists. His campaign knows how to harvest cellphone numbers. Ditto for the Guv race, where ConservaDem Gina Hinojosa hopes to unseat Strangeabbott, and the Lite Gov race, where Vikki Goodwin is battling Goeb. Maybe they’re planning a late rush, BUT, early voting started today. It’s like a baseball manager who has his closer inside the fire extinguisher cabinet with “break glass in case of emergency,” then decides that the seventh inning isn’t an emergency as other pitchers melt down. It does you no good on Nov. 4.

I mean, personally, as a well-informed non-duopoly voter who will undervote half the executive and legislative races, who will undervote most judicial races on political science ethics grounds of opposing partisan judicial elections, and who will undervote the 15th Court of Appeals on other political grounds (see footnote at bottom), you couldn’t reach me anyway.

That said, on Monday, I got my first Talafreako text. It talked about Kenny Boy’s blank-check support for data centers and how that will drive electric prices up. Much smarter than texts by Elmo, or any of the other wingnut PACs texting me earlier.

So, I wasn’t as snarky in return. I asked, rhetorically, what Talarico’s stance was on opposing Zionism, then indicated it was rhetorical by saying “I already knew.” (Answer: He’s a squish.) I then said it was too bad there was no Green or independent lefty in the race. If there’s a human reading any of these texts, maybe they’ll figure out my plan to undervote.

So, at least one Dem is in the texting world, or a PAC supporting them is. Where’s the direct mail? 

This goes back to Beto-Bob O’Rourke’s run for governor in 2022. I laughed at him going to Muleshoe. I laugh at statewide Democraps in Texas doing the same, in general, today.

But, Beto-Bob never came to Texoma — not in the flesh, nor in direct mail, or in smartphone texts. And, he probably didn’t go to Muleshoe in direct mail or smartphone texts, either. (This also shows that statewide Dems are just visiting ruraldom to affirm the powers of the county Democratic jefe while extracting a few bucks.)

That said, when driving to Hagerman Saturday, Talafreako had a full-size billboard rented, the traditional version, not a digital one. First statewide candidate I’ve seen in our area with that.

So, Talarico is doing at least part of the outreach. Other statewide Dems, at least the two big races, and definitely guv, where Hinojosa has at least some money? 

If you lose, your introspection should start with the few paragraphs above.

And not just on fliers and texts.

Per the above, it’s always fun to bag on Dan Patrick.

That said, in both 2022 and this year (unless something late breaks in the next day or two), Patrick was the ONLY candidate of EITHER party for statewide office to do a statewide, or nearly statewide except the smallest of papers, ad buy via the Texas Press Association. (Tex-ass had just one statewide race in 2024 and neither Havana/Cancun/Calgary Ted Cruz nor Colin Allred bought anything.)

Goeb does say he cares about rural areas, as part of this. That said, if he really cared, he would have fought Strangeabbott on vouchers.

Reminder: My "Gadfly slate" went up last Friday. 

FOOTNOTE: 

My least bad method for judicial selection is a retention election system, and from having been in New Mexico for part of my newspaper career, I know how it works. My second least bad is what Pro Publica recently discussed, the “Missouri method,” where, for at least higher court systems, a nonpartisan panel of lawyers recommends three candidates to the governor, who has to pick from that list.

On the 15th, it’s a clearly politicized court that’s a handout to Rethuglican plutocratic friends. On non-undervoting, one Court of Criminal Appeals slot has a Libertarian candidate who explicitly supports jury nullification. He’ll likely get my vote. Meanwhile, none of the three Democrat candidates will explicitly say, “I oppose the death penalty, and on the CCA, I’ll restrict it as much as possible” or words to that effect.

We actually have a debate in a Texas statewide office — but ...

Hey, we actually had a debate between candidates for a statewide office, as Railroad Commish contenders Jon Rosenthal and Bo French squared off. As for why Rosenthal hasn't raised as much money as previous Dems running for the office? I suspect that Talarico has suck the monetary oxygen out of the room called Texas for other Democrats.

As for the race? This:

The “Drill, Baby, Drill” Democrat, as Rosenthal calls himself, has had to take time away from the issues to address his opponent’s raucous opinions.

Is why I will undervote. 

Rather than explaining to the public what the Railroad Commission does do, Rosenthal, explain what it needs to be doing in an era of climate change. You haven't. This race is ultimately not about you vs Bo French, it's about the Railroad Commission versus the future.

A second debate has reportedly been scheduled. Will it happen? 

The full Gadfly Slate in Texas elections, 2026

First, now more than ever, I'm more and more comfortable with undervoting races rather than voting for someone from the left hand of the duopoly that is "meh." Or a hypocrite.

Let's dig in, going in order of my sample ballot in my corner of Tex-ass.

Senate: Undervote. I'd vote for independent Jade Simmons to play the piano for me — and maybe (yes, making a male observation) tickle my personal ivories. I don't need "centrist" candidates, though. Democrat? Here’s part 1 and part 2 on Talafreako the hypocritico.

Here's a Trib q-and-a with Talarico, Libertarian Ted Brown, and no-show (yes, for an emailed q-and-a) Kenny Boy being filled in from past statements. Statements by Talafreako that stand out? No, we don't need yet more Border Patrol. As for tech surveillance, the BP and the private companies that make it have played Alphonse and Gaston on the non-use of border tech designed to prevent immigrant crossing deaths.

Side note: I fault the Trib for running the absent Paxton's past-derived answers first. 

US House Dist. 26: 20,000 Mules Above the Desert (I see what I did there) couldn't make me vote for Brandon Gill. Libertarian Phil Gray, interestingly, believes in the government using ESG guidelines. Obviously NOT one of the Mises Mice. He also supports Medicare buy-in being offered. But, he spoils himself by being an anti-China Cold War 2.0 guy. And, I can't find an explicit position by either him or Democrat Steven Shook on Palestine and Israel, let alone Russia-Ukraine. Undervote.

Governor: Gina Hinojosa is a ConservaDem on reproductive choice and on other things. Libertarian Pat Gray supports vouchers. No Green here, either. Undervote.

Light Guv: Green Kevin McCormick never answered my emails on where he stood on 2025’s Proposition 4, and the Texas GP's executive committee backing it, per my latest callout of Texas Greens on this issue; I webmail contacted him last month. Three weeks later, no answer. Dem Vikki Goodwin wants to at least partially legalize cannabis, shockingly supports ranked choice voting, at least at local levels, and ALSO has in the past backed Texas joining other states and allowing citizen initiatives. Vote Democrat.

AG: Republican nominee Mayes Middleton is even nuttier than Kenny Boy Paxton. Nathan Johnson is at least somewhat on the left of Texas Democrats. That said, other than running as the anti-Paxton, he offers little. I may undervote; still not decided.

Comptroller? I have proof positive that Democratic Comptroller candidate Sarah Eckhardt is a squish on BDS. Texas Greens are generally dead to me right now over Proposition 4, but I will vote Green Shehla Fahzi in this race. Totally. 

Ag Commish: Democratic candidate Clayton Tucker has a boatload of bad stocks unethical investments, including multiple oil companies. Nate Sheets is a nutter accusing China of "agro-terrorism" and is even stupider than Mayes Middleton. The campaign has a recent interesting twist. Undervote.

Railroad Commish: Bo French is an obvious racist and Jon Rosenthal is anything but. That said, as a leftist, ex-Green and real environmentalist who knows we're in a climate crisis, I don't like that he doesn't talk about that issue himself, nor does he talk about the RRC doing more to promote solar, wind, and even geothermal. He does, like in an Inside Climate News interview, tout carbon capture. Gack. Undervote.

Land Commish: Dawn Buckingham has gone along with Dannie Goeb on politicizing the Alamo. The Land Office does to a degree have a climate change impact, but I'll probably hold my nose to a degree and vote Democrat Benajamin Flores.

State Rep. District 68: Undervote. I think incumbent David Spiller is a hypocrite on his school vouchers flip-flop as well as a wingnut, but, Jasmine Henderson? You're going to have to suffer for the PRO Gainesville stupidities of your sister, as of course she eventually did. 

Judicial races? I have rarely wasted time wading through most of them. To the degree drugs are at issue, I'm OK with supporting others pulling the Libertarian lever if they know the Democrat is not that good.

That said, I will say at least consider Libertarian Mark Ash for CCA Place 3. He supports jury nullification. I can't find his stance on the death penalty, though. Sadly, candidates generally seem to feel that they can't state an opinion on that, as that would be "discussing cases before the court."

That said, more and more, I dislike partisan judicial elections, unless necessary in a retention election system. And on principal, I refuse to vote in Strangeabbott's new 15th Court of Appeals races.

(Another option for at least part of judicial selection is Missouri's, as described by Pro Publica: For appeals courts and the state supreme court, lawyers select a three-candidate group and the governor picks from among the three.)

That said, a final reminder: This Politico piece is right, not in the sense that polling is THAT far off, but in that many MAGAts continue to say "fuck you" to polling in general, or in some cases, may even deliberately lie to pollsters. 

 

 

Texas Progressives talk pre-election updates

Off the Kuff did a quantitative comparison of the polls for Senate and Governor's races in Texas, and found that the latter was closer. 

SocraticGadfly looked at the oil contamination in Johnson County and said it smaked of similar land pollution in North Texas back in the 1990s.

If Mayes Middleton says he wants to put god back in government, doesn't that mean that Kenny Boy removed god?  

South Texas may indeed be moving on from Trump, but I doubt it's moving toward any statewide Democrat. 

Neil at Houston Democracy Project says we’ve had a number of wins at Houston City Council in ‘26 & we’ll do the work for a more progressive and responsive council in ‘27.  

Before becoming a US Senator, Kansas' Roger Marshall was a loan-sharker cosplaying a doctor. 

Faux News has apparently benched Karl Rove for being kind of outspoken. 

Contra non-skeptical leftist, or better, pseudoleftists, like Max Blumenthal, not only did China have forced labor in Xinjiang in the past, it now does again, this time with fish farming. 

 G. Elliott Morris reminds us that the fundamentals are aligned with the polls.

Isabel Latz argues that El Pasoans can’t afford leaders who ignore extreme heat.

Murray Newman eulogizes First Court of Appeals Justice Kristin Guiney. 

Your Local Epidemiologist gives you the facts as they are known about that plague outbreak in Russia. (YLE could have noted that plague is still naturally occurring in the US. But did not. And, the book she points you toward is by nutter Annie Jacobsen.)

Leo XIV, show us the money, the Observer says

The Observer, reaching way outside Texas, calls on the Vatican to crack open its $73 billion gold mine. The author is triangulating off Leo XIV's recent "Magnifica Humanitas." The problem, or the reality, is tseveral-fold, without excusing Rome. First, not all of its assets are liquid. Second, at $73 billion, not trillion, that's one-tenth of what Elmo Musk or Bozo Bezos are worth, at least on paper. And, that's just the richest of plutocrats, not the whole schmeer. Third is that the author is privileging the United States, and possibly Mexico, when il papa rules Catholics around the globe.

Fourth, you're asking a man who wears ruby-colored, and perhaps ruby-edged slippers while carrying a gold crozier to do this?

Fifth, many of the assets that would be liquified to get to this point would be bought by plutocrats. That said, if the Vatican were to sell, say, the entire ceiling of the Sistine Chapel, that alone would bring more than $73 billion.

Sixth, you're asking a religious leader who runs a body that still opposes women in leadership, still opposes  women's reproductive freedoms and other things, to show the world "magnificent humanity" through money alone? 

The latest all things Kenny Boy Paxton as the election nears the finish line

The Monthly says Angela Paxton knows what she's doing without even mentioning the Tammy Wynette angle. Really? (Not on "she knows what she's doing," but on it not invoking the Wynette angle.) More seriously, exactly what IS she doing? Paxton's kind of a boat anchor and the state banned official straight ticket voting by voting machine lever years ago. Does she think Tammy Wynette will play well in the divorce court? Is she looking to a 2028 run for some other office? Hoping for a Strangeabbott appointment to something?  These are all possibilities, and I'm sure others exist; the Monthly explores none of them.

In a longform piece, Chris Hooks discusses snitches — three recorded snippets of Kenny Boy after the GOP midterms, but apparently from at least two different snitchers — bemoaning that he reportedly has no control over his campaign. Well, Ken, when you first decided to commit apparent securities fraud, second decided to diddle someone not named Angela and third decided to stick your head fully up Trump's ass to counter Nos. 1 and 2, you surrendered control. From there, Chris wonders who the leaker/s is/are, and speculates, by their target choices, they're DC insiders pissed the GOP is having to play defense for Paxton rather than pushing Big John Cornyn to the finish line.

Dan Solomon spins on the first and second to talk about the weirdness of new Paxton ads. Solomon's talking only about teevee/streaming ads. This doesn't include the weirdness of Kenny Boy's direct mail flyers, which seem to indicate Commies, led by Uncle Karl himself, are hiding under every small-town bush to push Talarico over the finish line.

Sorry for the wingnuts wanting "proof of life" from Talafreako Talarico while ignoring the person BlueAnon calls Moscow Mitch, but Talarico is alive, well, and back on the campaign trail. 

If Mayes Middleton says he wants to put god back in government, doesn't that mean that Kenny Boy removed god? 

Kenny Boy certainly did NOT remove the grifting, including at least $3.3 million in security detail grifting. 

We're way past the original timetable for the first of three debates allegedly originally planned between Kenny Boy and Talafreako, past the date for the second, and just past the date for the third, with early voting starting next Monday. Conclusion: No debates. Per Dan Solomon talking about Kenny Boy's nervousness even while being asked softball questions in an interview, he's probably decided that looking chicken is less bad than looking like a fuck-up. That said, how, and how well, does Talafreako exploit this? My guess? Not all that well. He said nothing when the first deadline passed, was sick when the second passed, and said nothing Monday when the third passed.

To me, this would be easy. All Talarico has to do is say something like:

I'm leading in the polls and have had a steady lead for the past two weeks. Ken Paxton must really be afraid of something if he won't debate me.

There you are. 

Meanwhile, while he still leads, per a story from Yahoo, the latest MR/Recon poll shows he has slipped back to inside the margin of error, by half a percentage point. More on the poll, which also includes the gov's race, here.