Dear Rick Perry: Davos has no coyotes, but it does have gun control laws

So, don't attempt to pack heat when you go to Switzerland to hobnob with the rich and famous after pretending to care about the little people. Because, you don't qualify for a permit.

It does have plenty of predatory capitalists, but, given the woes and travails of your emerging technology slush fund, you know all about those folks. Instead of guns, you have beers and shots with folks like that — not gunshots, but mulimillion-dollar money shots.

Per his press office:

Gov. Rick Perry will be in Davos, Switzerland from Tuesday, January 21 until Saturday, January 25, where he will hold private meetings and participate in two panel discussions at the World Economic Forum.

On Thursday, the governor will participate as a panelist in “The Drugs Dilemma: Consequences for Society, Politics and Business.”

On Friday, he will participate in the roundtable discussion “Governors Session: Health Summit.”

Private meetings? Like when he flies to other states here in the US of A and tries to sell businesses on relocating to Texas. Ricky Boy, that ain't flying nowhere.

Well, I take that back. Trans Texas Corridor partner Cintra might be over there, humping for toll road work.

Second, that "Drugs Dilemma" meeting? Rick, they're going to tell you to go easy in the nuttery of the War on Drugs. And when you try to talk about your Texas Miracle, they're going to laugh right in your face.

Governors' Session: Health Summit? Let me guess — this is a GOP governors' session to bitch about Obamacare. Any real health summit in Europe, if you talked about health care in Texas? They're going to laugh right in your face.

And, hey, it's time to trot out "famous handshakes concern trolling for $100!"

Because Tricky Ricky will have at least one Chinese Commee with which to hobnob. Jiang Jianqing, Chairman of the Board, Industrial and Commercial Bank of China, People's Republic of China, will be there.

And, the Trickster, during his time in Davos, seemingly can't find time to attend any of the nearly half-dozen sessions on global warming. Surely one of them would be of more power than his drought relief prayers, which he admitted himself, again, this week, still aren't working.