December 31, 2015

The 2015 Don't Think in Texas winner

Here's my offerings for the people who compel me to riff on the Don't Mess with Texas slogan and ask someone with brains and skeptical thinking, or Brains and Eggs and skeptical thinking, to yes, please mess with Texas.

Affluenza Jefe Ethan Couch
It would be so easy to to award "affluenza" teen, I mean Señor and Jefe (heh, heh) Ethan Crouch and mom Tonya. But, there are other worthy nominees.

There's Ken "Kenny Boy" Paxton, on indictment for issues related to securities fraud. Latest: a Daddy Warbucks backer suing to keep the special prosecutors, well suing to keep them from being paid for doing their jobs.

Then, there's Gov. Greg Abbott, who surely opposes Sharia Law in Texas, but sure sounds like he wants Vatican Law being taught as part of state law continuing education requirements. That's beyond being a fear-mongerer over Jade Helm this summer and to the right of Rick Perry in his first year as governor.

Those top two politico listings together remind me that the Trickster was also indicted. But, such is the depth of this year's numbnuts lineup, he may fall short of the top.

There's plenty of other elected politicians who outstupid and outarrogant Rick Perry.

Just this week, as part of oppo research in a contested primary, we've all learned that "former fetus" state Rep. Jonathan Stickland hypocritically believes smoking the occasional doobie, is well, just all right with him, speaking of doobies. Far more disgustingly, he believes its OK for a man to rape his wife. Insert Bill Cosby joke somewhere, I guess.

I suppose Former Fetus will soon be at a theater, starring in "Inglourious Blunts."

Even more disgusting is that a lot of males in the Tea Party agree with him, I'll venture.

Even more disgusting, sad, or a mix of both is that a lot of women in the Tea Party ALSO probably agree with him.

And, there's still other idiotic elected officials ahead of Perry.

Like Abel Reyna, the McClellan County DA who has used the Waco biker shootout to pretty much ignore the Fourtth Amendment and other things. It's nothing new with him, taking hang em high to a whole new level. Guess he wants to keep that privatized county jail full.

And in the not-elected but gawd-she-tried-hard division is Katrina Pierson, doing her best to be the Sarah Palin of Texas.

I haven't even mentioned Ted Cruz. Or Gohmert Pyle, aka Louie Gohmert, who must be off his game recently. Or Ag Commish Sid Miller, between calling "unhealthy" food "healthy" then having his social media staff go Islamophobe on us. Or another would-be Constitution wrecker, Rep. Cecil Bell, trying to pre-empt the Supreme Court legalizing gay marriage. Or Ted Cruz and his apparent either emotional cluelessness or a personality disorder, along with serial lies and more. Or Danny Goeb, also known as Dan Patrick.

But, let's get back to the non-politicos side.

Remember the backgrounder to Ethan Couch. There was a state district judge, Jean Boyd, who gave Ethan Couch his 10 years probation as a "sentence." And, there was the psychologist, G. Dick Miller (nice name, by the way), who used the word "affluenza" in describing Couch.

There's also notorious sports figures like Johnny Money Manziel, Greg Hardy and the Jethro Jerry Jones who signed him, and more.

It's tempting to name a political, and a non-political, winner.

But, we're going to cut this Gordian knot with one winner.

It's not an individual, but a group.

Per Progress Texas noting that Ted Cruz got his 2012 Senate GOP nomination with just 5 percent of registered GOP voters, our winner is:

Texas Tea Party GOP voters.

They've infested not only Cruz, but Dan Patrick and other numbnuts on Texas.

And, they support the growing income inequality behind the "affluenza" claims. (Boyd was a Republican, let's note.)

That said, I'm also controversially naming a Miss Congeniality.

And that would be Sabrina Lowe, the Rowlett woman who claims to have prayed away a tornado.

If you listen to the clip at this link, to me, it sounds pretty much like she's an African-American woman.

Given the higher degree of religiosity, and conservative religiosity, among blacks than white Democrats, this is going to be an ongoing problem in the future. It's part of why HERO failed at the ballot box in Houston. It's part of why black-white HIV rates are massively different. And, it's a reason why Battleground Texas' demographic assumptions, although focused primarily on Hispanics, are so wrong — for similar reasons, with further explainer here.

At the same time, there's hope, at least among minorities in less reddish states. The official Black Lives Matter (not Deray Mckesson), as Deadspin notes, has many LGBQT members.

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